A man once said, “I wish there were instructions that came with having children.”
My friend, there are instructions and they are in the Bible. There are answers for every thing that we need to know about raising a family, if only we would go back to the Bible.
In raising children, the first thing we must do is get the home right. The apostle Paul said in Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands, love your wives.” If all the husbands would love their wives as God expects them to do, then fewer homes would break up. And this goes for wives also.
What makes a home is as the old saying goes, “the home is where the heart is.”
Genesis 2:18 “And the Lord God said, It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.”
Husbands and wives have to work together to make a home. It’s not always easy. Marriage is not a 50/50 thing. Most of the time it’s more like 90/10.
Husbands play an important role in the home. Not only does he have to love his wife, he also has to be a good father.
Ephesians 6:4 “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”
Don’t intentionally make your children mad or upset to get a reaction. Talk to them. Tell them you love them. This is what children want to her from their daddies.
Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”
Fathers are to train their children. Teach them to love God and have respect towards God.
There are instructions for the women as well.
Again, in Ephesians 5:22 “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”
Wives love your husbands. Show respect towards them. Many times the wives will take over not even thinking about her husband. There are wives who go out of the home to work. There’s nothing wrong with the wives working. There may be times when there’s a real need for the wife to work outside of the home to make ends meet. Many times wives will go out of the home to work so they can “keep up with the Joneses” as the saying goes. The wives are to be keepers of the home.
In Titus 2:4-5 “That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.”
Mothers need to be examples before their daughters.
But then, there are the children. Children have a role to play in the home as well. Ephesians 6:1 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.”
Children will usually grow up to be like their parents. How can a child learn to obey when the parents don’t follow the rules put before them? Little eyes are always watching.
It’s up to the father first to love his wife and then his children. The mother has a very important roll as well.
Titus 2:3-4 “The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children.”
Sober means to be alert, watchful.
Many times, husbands and wives fail to keep their home together. Children are thrown away for someone else to care for. This is not what God meant for a home to be. The kind of home that God wants for His children is a place where they can feel safe, a place where the children can have a father and mother there for them.
On the unpleasant side, there are times when one spouse just simply can’t stay with the other. It’s sad, but it happens. Then there are times when parents do all they can to teach their children and have them at church services as they should. But, when they go out on their own they forget God and where they came from. Satan is always standing by waiting for the opportunity to snatch one away. It’s sad, but it happens.
May God bless our homes and families.
Matthew 6:33 “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”
Billy Free is a member of Southside Church of Christ and a regular contributor to the Chickasaw Journal.